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What Would You Do? 6

You've always been a Yardie, in fact the only Nigerian thing about you is your parents, you don't go by your given name and everyone knows you as Masta Blasta, because you Blast a mean tune!, you've been spinning decks for a while and have worked your way up from DJ-ing up in Stonebridege, Harlseden and Bixton and you're sweet with all the yard man dem! you've made a name for yourself as the rasta version of Fat Boy Slim! the most famous DJ to date. You've been playing some up market events and and next year you hope to play Ibiza, after that you know you've hit the big time and folks will buy your compilations

Your Nigerian friends call you General Pype, they said it so often you had to check out that breddah, you're strictly roots and you like his sound and definitely believe that we are All "Champions for Life"! Respect to General Pype!

It's a beautiful summer night in London and you're spinning decks at a club in Mayfair, everyone's looking hot!, you spot some Nigerian musicians in the VIP  living it up! and one of them has on more bling than Liberace (Libb-er-rah-chee), the groupies are all around them doing their thing and you manage to keep everyone dancing all night with the some sick chuunes. It's a successful night and you feel just right!

The night's finally over and you're packing your decks, you're beat and can't wait to get home to your long time squeeze Sha-ni-qua, you flag down a cab and start loading your decks into the boot when one of the Nigerians from the VIP approaches your cab and asks you if he can hitch a ride to his hotel.

You turn round perplexed and ask him to get another cab, he's got on more bling than a bling ting and says his name is Don Something or One thing and he got separated from his crew! He says he's all outta cash but if you pay for him to get to his hotel he'll pay up! You give him the once over and for real you're too tired for this drama! but by the look of him you think he's good for it and ask him to hop in.

Don One thing or Something directs the cab to the outer limits of Brixton and asks the black cab to stop in front of a high rise block of flats, he tells you that he works as an lookalike for a famous Nigerian producer and stands in for him sometimes at public events, the producer lent him these clothes, in fact he does not have two peas to rub together, his bling is actually cubic zirconia and his pocket's a desert. You look at the meter on the cab and the fare reads £200.

What Would You Do?


  1. That is where I will start to ya were. Eh, which nonsense is that.

  2. Anonymous I'm with u, ya were big time! LOL!

  3. What?!! I'll just get out of the cab and leave! Let the guy deal with the taxi driver. I'll find another cab


  4. Yeah, but it's ur cab and he just hitched a ride with u!


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